ONE SIMPLE WAY TO BE MORE LOVING!

When your intent is in accordance with the universe, things start happening.

When we open our hearts to the possibility of love, things begin conspiring to make it more abundant in our lives.

If you’re familiar with the law of attraction, you’ll understand our ability to attract positive things into our life. The law states that everything in the universe is made up of different energies, and these energies vibrate at different frequencies. The frequencies operate on high or low levels depending on whether we have positive or negative influences taking part in our lives. What makes these universal energies interesting, is their ability to attract similar ones based on the dominate nature of our thoughts, beliefs and actions, and this occurs both consciously and unconsciously.

If you haven’t been exposed to this line of thinking, the key part to understand is our whole demeanour runs on different levels. When we are feeling great and achieving things, doing well and feeling success, in any areas of life (relationships, love, career, health, friendships etc.), we are running on higher frequencies, thus higher levels. More positive energies are vibrating throughout our body therefore we feel more success in varied areas of our life.

On the other hand, when we have unfortunate circumstances taking place, are not in a positive state of mind, feel as though we can’t move forward because of the constant setbacks that keep taking place, we are running on lower frequencies, thus lower levels. This means more negative circumstances turn up due to our dominant demeanour holding us back.

What I want you to do is try connect with the law of attraction for a moment. I know from experience, when I am running on lower frequencies life just seems more dull. Things that generally seem easy enough become more difficult. Activities that often are enjoyable, seem less pleasurable. Money may not flow as freely, work may be more of a struggle, even health can plummet due to this negative resonance corrupting all aspects of life. The negativity, somehow flows into more avenues and while it’s not wanted, it still makes itself present. It’s times like this when the saying ‘bad luck comes in threes’ shows it’s truth. And what really is being shown is the universes law of attraction and how our dominant vibrations attract similar energies. If negative vibrations are making themselves more present, than more negative experiences arise due to this pull in energy. Conversely, when I am vibrating on a higher frequency, more abundance, pleasure, success and fulfilment seems to enter my life. I’ll wake each morning jumping from bed eagerly awaiting to start my day. I have the drive to continue to make my aspirations come true. It seems almost effortless to be excited and happy because the vibrations in my body are aligning to make peace and joy flow more freely. It wasn’t until I really tapped into this line of thinking that I truly began to understand how much of an affect my attitude and thus energy has on my whole existence.

Now if you’re anything like I, you’ll want the positive energies radiating as much as possible. And why not, it’s these positive forces that give us purpose, meaning, fulfilment and the sense of achievement. Unfortunately, what I have found, is this abundance doesn’t just come naturally. It does take effort and it must be something you’re continually willing to work on. That is why I love this activity! I have personally seen and experienced how powerful it is in raising vibrations – particularly our love vibration so if you are on board, you must give this a try!

The activity:

Choose a loved one who you want to focus on. It could be yourself, a partner, family member or close friend. Self love should come before anything else, therefore if yours is lacking I strongly advise you to start here. Once our self-love is truly blossoming, other love relationships will enter our lives more seamlessly. For this activity, initially I focused on Tom, however, when I revisited it I focused on myself and it is incredible how thankful and proud it made me feel.

You don’t need anything fancy, a piece of paper and pen, your computer, anything that allows you to sit, document and write your thoughts.

Once the person is chosen (and I highly recommend it being yourself first), write their name on the top of the page and then begin to write all the things you love about them. Focus on anything and everything. Write what you love about their appearance, personality, things they do, things they say, document as much as can come to mind.

What you will find, as I did, I couldn’t feel anything but love when I did this activity. I already adore Tom, but when I did this activity it allowed me to really reflect on what it is that makes him so special to me. There is so much literature advocating the idea that happy and loving relationships have the ability to massively boost our vibrations, and by doing this type of activity, I’m reminding myself why I am so in love with this person. It 100% did raise my vibration and also highlighted how thankful I am.

If you love your partner and want to refresh why, need to love yourself more or want to work on a family or friendship love, give this a go. I can’t see how you could feel anything but admiration, love and respect when you think about a person in this way.

Bye for now,

With love,

Nellie xo

GOAL SETTING FROM A PLACE OF ABUNDANCE

Why do we bother trying to achieve our dreams? Goals? Pleasures? It’s a funny question to ponder. What is it that drives us in search of this constant fulfilment? I personally love goal setting, creating good habits, having regular routines, meeting deadlines and reaching my goals, but the other day I asked myself ‘why?’ And it really got me thinking.

When I thought it out and attempted to justify why I want to always be making progress – my answer was because it’s my life purpose. Internally and externally I want to be the best version of myself. If I set goals, I will always be working to improve and make better my current situation and that for myself was the answer. Goal setting is an outlet for manifesting the abundance to come and I want to make right now, and the future, as bright as possible. 

I recently listened to a podcast by Brooke Castillo, the Master Certified Instructor. Author and Curriculum Creator for The Life Coach School, and her words really resonated with me. She was talking about goals and how they should be put in place to make our existence and time more meaningful on this planet. I think what she said is bang on!

She then went on to say that goal setting is a spiritual practice, and for goals to be truly effective, they must come from, and be set in a place of happiness. I also love this line of thinking! I hadn’t really thought of it in this way before but if we aren’t happy, how can we set good, achievable goals? Thinking about the concept in this way kinda blew my mind as it 100% resonates with me.

If you think of yourself in a time of struggle, your goal setting will usually be to solve a problem. Usually there is something lacking, you’re not happy and you want to fix something. This places an emphasis on goals to solve negative situations – fix things that are not going well. But if we change the perspective of goals and set them when in a state of happiness, we will be enhancing our content and flourishing life. So rather than setting goals from a place of failure and trying to dig our way out, we want to create and work on goals from a state of contentment and joy.

I love this idea: when we are coming from a place of abundance – our goals are positively influenced to enhance and make better our already great and current situation. This for me is the meaning and purpose of goals! We need to be happy with ourselves, happy in the now, happy in the moment and from that we can think positively about the future and create goals from a place of satisfaction.

So drawing back to the original question, does achieving our dreams matter? Yes, most definitely yes. I think everyone should be striving to achieve their dreams. If you love organising and planning then go at it with full force but remember the planning should come from a place of abundance, and when it does – great things will happen!

Let’s achieve those greatest dreams!

With love,
Nellie

PROBLEMS…? WHAT PROBLEMS

Think about this – problems aren’t problems until we make them a problem.

If you haven’t picked up on it yet, you’ll soon realise I’m pretty psyched and excited about positive psychology.

I love studying happiness and examining how we can become fulfilled and happy beings. Through this field of study I’m learning how to coach myself and apply certain strategies to my own life so I can continue to move forward and progress as a human. The biggest theme, which keeps popping up in my personal study, is the idea that we are in control of our minds and we choose how we want to feel.

So if we choose how we want to feel, then why do so many of us feel bad? I personally never want to feel bad, but it happens, sometimes often, and unfortunately it can be a massive struggle to get out of. It could be as small a thing as feeling bad when we wake in the morning, and the mood carries on longer than desired (me this morning), to things much more difficult such as loss of a job or having a heated fight with a loved one.

What I have come to realise, in any problematic scenario, the reason we feel bad is because of the way we are thinking about it. The cure, therefore, to stopping ourselves feeling bad, resides in ourselves. We have the power to change how we feel and the tricky part is the effort, time and practice it takes.

Imagine this scenario:

You are driving in your car and another driver is not paying attention, totally cuts you off and almost hits your car. In the moment, you swerve to get out of the way and almost crash into a telegraph pole. No harm is done; it was just a close call.

Now, you can respond in various ways. One person might absolutely lose their shit, turn into a rage and start screaming obscenities from their car. Another person may be a little shocked, think that was lucky and that’s it! They then get back to their day feeling joyful.

This is the exact same situation for two different people, yet their thinking, then response determines whether or not it turns into a problem.

Now, I’m not saying changing our thinking is an easy thing. In fact, it’s an incredibly difficult and hard thing to do. It requires a lot of internal focus. You have to pay attention to the voice inside and listen to what it’s saying. And a lot of the time it can be saying horrible things, but when we change the thoughts – happiness, magic and true abundance can shine through.

It really is achievable to minimise and even eliminate the negative emotions and reactions that come as a response to a thought. So if we really want to try minimise the drama and/or problems in our lives, we need to change our thinking!

My first step of guidance – start to listen. If you’re not feeling great, ask yourself ‘why?’ and truly listen to what you think. Listen to what your mind says, write it down if it helps and unpack what’s actually going on in your head to cause so much upset, worry, distress or annoyance.

It is easy to become a robot body and run from pure emotion, unfortunately, in those situations, we are not being present. We are not consciously taking action and without paying attention to ourselves, we cannot be mindful. When we run on autopilot emotions, the only person we truly hurt is ourselves because we are not being in tune and understanding what the real issue is. At the heart of mindfulness is paying attention. So always, if in doubt of your mood or why a problem is seeming much bigger than it needs to, pay attention to your thoughts.

Second big piece of advice – try remove yourself from the situation and imagine it happening to someone else. Does it still seem such a big deal? Does it still require so much stress, anxiety, annoyance, frustration? If someone was telling you about this problem, what advice could you give them, the magic here is if the advice you come up with is productive and positive – you can use it. Apply it straight away. If we change the way we think, we can change how we see a perceived ‘problem’ – it may not be a problem anymore!

Have a go at thought play, listen to your mind and see if next time you can minimize the intensity of a problem just by thinking about the situation differently.

Bye for now.

With love,

Nellie

xo

 

WHY YOU SHOULD TRY GUIDED MEDITATION

If you have already been introduced to the magnificent benefits of meditation, you’ll know how perfect it is for your mind, body and soul. If you have heard about it, but never really given it a go, I strongly encourage you to start – as soon as possible. If you’re ready to get on board, but don’t know how to begin or set up a practice, keep reading, I’ve got some handy tips for you.

Guided meditation is the easiest, and most suitable way to start if you’re new to the practice. The internet has made it so easy; YouTube is a fantastic tool with hundreds of channels to choose from. You simply browse, select and subscribe to your favourite creators, choose an appropriate time, then practice. That’s it!

Only recently, Tom and I started using guided meditations in the morning as our wake up alarm.  As our days are busy, I often found I wasn’t doing daily meditation unless I really pencilled it into my schedule. Now that I use this tool in the morning, everyday I am waking with meditation. It creates wonderful energy and sets us both up for a perfect day.

Since starting this practice I’ve felt more success, appreciation and contentment with my days and it flows right through to the evenings. Even more, I feel like I am making more time later in the day to practice further because it’s naturally cleared the way to a higher resonating emotional state. Overall, it brings more joy, hope, love, and gratitude to life and makes the experience of being here that little bit more special.

Listed below are some of the great benefits of guided meditation:

1. You don’t have to know how to meditate

Someone conducts and you follow along. There is no pressure on yourself to be a meditating guru. Listen, observe and enjoy the magical mind journey. Now some people will say they get easily intimidated by meditation because they feel they can’t shut off, focus, or stop thinking about external things, but what needs to be understood is this brain chatter is actually a natural part of the meditation release process. If any thoughts arise just let them drift away as if you are releasing them in a river and return your focus to breath. An additional benefit of guided practice is someone directs your thinking, so even if you do wander, their voice and guidance will aid relaxation. 

2. It’s visualisation based

You start with an intention and envisage the outcome. It allows your mind to become clear, still and reflective. Visualisation is powerful in the way it can affect our reality by imagination. When we visualise an experience before we act on it we are better prepared for the situation as we have already mentally practised it. Visualisations also come with added health benefits; many studies have found visualisation can decrease stress, depression and alleviate pain and headaches. The mind has a powerful effect on the body; getting into deep states of relaxation and using visualisations provide the perfect conditions for whole-body healing. 

3. It works as a healing technique

You can focus on a disrupt in your life and work to resolve and mend any distress. Further, it can help to unpack hidden blocks that you may not be aware of: there could be an unconscious strain that’s holding you back from reaching your full potential, by addressing it at a subconscious level it gets to the root of the problem and paves the way for lasting change. Guided and unguided healing meditations are fantastic tools for relaxing and calming our bodies and minds and bringing focus to growth and repair. 

4. You choose the time

You can choose any time of the day to practice. It is good to do it in the morning and envisage your perfect day unfolding, the feelings of love and compassion you should experience will bring positive energy to whatever you are achieving that day. In the evening it is nice to reflect on the day’s events and re-live the experiences you felt grateful for, really feeling gratitude is key and will set you up perfectly for a restful sleep.

5. Provides focus and intent

You can choose a focus, e.g. relaxation, releasing worry, gratitude, healing anxiety etc. and you can choose how long you want to meditate for. Videos range from 5 minutes to over an hour so you decide what time-frame best fits your schedule. You may find on different days, a different focus feels more right. The beauty of meditation is that it is your practice. Play around, Experiment. Enjoy being the only you there has ever been, and ever will be.  

I strongly recommend giving it a go if you’ve not yet established your meditation practice. If you’re already meditating but haven’t tried guided methods, why not dabble with the idea, it will compliment what you are already doing.

Make sure you try!

With love,

Nellie

THE BEAUTY OF GRATITUDE

I am thankful for the opportunity to start a new, fresh day. 

I am grateful for the friends and family I have. They’re supportive, loving and encourage me to be the best version of myself.

These are two very simple – yet powerful messages anyone can say everyday, to themselves, to show they are thankful.

When we show thankfulness we eliminate negativity and function at a higher level – allowing more acceptance, care and compassion into our lives.

These messages are so easy to say and are perfect examples of gratitude.

Gratitude therefore is an appreciation of all the things you are thankful for. It is paying respect to, and celebrating what we have and acknowledging the goodness and richness of our lives.

Unfortunately, some people can think gratitude is difficult, especially if we’re having a hard day. If at times you think you have nothing to be appreciative of  – I want you to think again.

What about the oxygen you’re breathing – you should be thankful for that!

What about the clothes on your back – you should be thankful for that!

Gratitude doesn’t have to be for some profound and unusual experience. In my opinion, when we show gratitude for the simplest things – this is when true happiness can really grow.

Try this next time you are having a bad day. List as many things you can of which you are happy for. It can be as simple as the appreciation for the food you’ve been able to eat.

Gratitude honestly makes you feel better – and it’s such a simple and easy thing to do. If you aren’t doing it yet, I strongly advise you to start. My life satisfaction has drastically improved just because I’m consciously making an effort to think about the good things I’m grateful for. Give it a go and if you’re really stuck have a look at these prompts, they’ll get you started.

With love,

Nellie

GRATTITUDE PROMPTS

Gratitude does not have to be difficult.

In fact, gratitude is a fantastic tool for shifting our focus from the lacks in our life to the abundance that is already present.

Just by the sheer focus on things we are thankful for, we attract more positivity and thus more happiness. When we are grateful our fears, disappointments and worries disintegrate because we are focusing on everything that is good in our lives.

Below are some simple prompts you can use every day to kick start your gratitude practice.

Enjoy!

THE POWER OF GRATTITUDE

This infographic designed my Mindvalley clearly sums up the importance of gratitude. Gratitude not only improves our health and wellbeing, it increases spiritualism, can boost our motivation, opens the doors for forgiveness and improves our social intelligence, which all inevitably makes us more happy. Through gratitude we become more in tune, feel more connected, show more appreciation, share more love  and therefore kindness in the world.

Enjoy the read and endeavour to sparkle more gratitude in each and every day!

With love,

Nellie